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Friday, October 31, 2008

The Dangers Of The Oldies Behind The Wheel.

Like I said in an earlier post, I've been rocking out to Thriving Ivory. In one of their songs they have some lyrics that go like this "So, call me California, call me what you will." Ummmm...I can't remember the last time I called someone California. Is that a new type of slang?

Thou shalt not take the name of a state in vain.

Anyway, so the other day my brothers and I were cruising through Salt Lake. We were stranded in the middle of the intersection as the light turned red because of all the traffic (you know how that happens on occasion, I guess I wasn't paying attention). Then this genius of an old man in a golden crown vic, pulls behind us, completely blocking all lanes of traffic. So, of course people start honking at the poor sucker. All I can see in my rear view were his bony knuckles, and beady little eyes that seemed to just be glazed over.

Anyway, I'm just minding my own business inching along, when we all feel this little bump from behind. I tell my Bro's that we've just been hit. They don't believe me. Then, "Whack!" We get hit again, this time they felt it! It's the senile old dude behind us, I tell them. And once again, we get bumped! I look in my mirrors and the old guy has barely even changed his expression. It looked like he was day dreaming, or watching T.V. So, I put on my blinker, so we can get out and talk to the guy, and then he bumps us, again and again, and again! I've got my head out the window yelling at the guy to knock it off, and that I can't go anywhere because of all the traffic, and to just take it easy! But again, he acts as though nothing is even happening.
So, after a few moments we pull over to the curb, hoping the guy will pull over next to us. Not a chance. He goes on by with out even looking over. So, Zak jumps out of the car and chases the dude's car down. (Now, again there was a lot of traffic, so he was probably clicking along at about 2 mph). Zak tells us later that when he finally stopped the guy and made him roll down the window, that the guy just started shaking. And as Zak grilled him about hitting us 6 times in a row, the guy denied all of it, and said that we were hitting him! But Zak wasn't buying it. So, then the old guy changed his story and said someone behind him was hitting him into us! So, Zak helped him remember that there wasn't anyone behind him! Anyway, needless to say, the old man had no idea what century he was in and simply drove away, leaving Zak quite upset and confused on the curb. Another eventful day in downtown Salt Lake.

Thankfully no damage was done.

What a dumb California.



Daems said...

okay, I vote that no more nasty photos are posted on your blog.

Boike said...

hey, that might be kurt one day...

Candyce Lewis said...

Poor old man. I bet Zak is pretty terrifying when he is mad...

Wahines in Bikinis said...

Elder Lewis, do you remember when I used to take your name in vain in the office days of the good ol MPLN pe?